First of all, when I was a young newlywed I decided that I did not want to have kids. When I started telling people this, some didn't understand why I would get married if I didn't want children. I went to a "Childfree" message board and someone mentioned gay marriage and how some people believe that gays shouldn't get married because they couldn't have kids. The idea was planted in my head how unfair that was. I wondered, "so what does that mean to my childfree marriage?"
I remember I read an article about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and how they said they wouldn't get married until everyone had the equal opportunity to get married. I thought that was a great stance.
And then, in the Fall of 2010, I took a Gender Studies class at school and that completely changed everything for me.
In my Gender Studies class, we talked a lot about society's role in creating Gender Roles. Gender is a social construct. We talked about "what it means to be a man and a woman." We learned that in some countries and cultures, there are not two separate genders, but there were three or even more. Another thing we discussed was the human sexuality scale, and how there is a sliding scale between heterosexuality and homosexuality. We learned about a theory where people are on a whole spectrum of sexualities, that many people are not purely heterosexual or homosexual.
Everyday I came home from class with my mind absolutely blown! I loved these topics and couldn't get enough. I would go home and tell my husband all about what I learned, and he looked at me like I had two heads. Over time, I feel the way I thought about people and the way my husband felt about people contributed to our growing apart.
Also, over time, I began to stop really believing fully in genders. I never really felt like I was the same as other "girls", but I was never really like "boys" either. I was something in between. I have grown into a person who thinks of people as people, not of people as separated into men and women (even though having a man-hating party would make one think otherwise of me.)
It is because of my belief that we are all just people that makes me believe in marriage equality. Because one is a person, they should be able to marry who they love, or who they desire to marry solely because they are a person, and a person should not be defined only by their gender which society has forced upon them.