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Sunday, January 5, 2014

Severing the Last Tie

I've been divorced from my first husband now for two years now. But there was one thing still tying me to him. I had a daily reminder of him and why things went wrong. Its something I used everyday. It was a constant reminder of what went wrong. Yesterday, January 4th, 2013 I finally let go of the last tie I had to him. I said goodbye to "Berger":

And now it's story time. This blog post will explain part of what went wrong. The downfall of our marriage really started when we bought this car.

My ex was very handy and loved doing "fix up" projects. We had several damaged properties that we fixed up. Our house and condo were pretty much finished, so he needed a new project. And I needed a new car. Apparently he thought those needs should intertwine.

So we went looking for a car... he decided he didn't want to have a car payment. So his great idea was to buy a damaged vehicle and fix it up, not knowing much about cars. I begged and begged him not to buy a car like this for me. But he was a very good debater and arguer, so I finally gave in. And I have regretted that for the past three years.

The car (I called it Berger) never really got fixed all that well. The front end was mismatched, paint peeling, the grill was missing. Looks aside, the computer in the car was screwed up so we couldn't get it to pass inspection and emissions. The breaks are bad. The battery and wiring are all screwed up so the battery got drained constantly.

Aside from all of this, I knew I had to get rid of the car. Because I said, it reminded me of my ex and what went wrong.

Now don't get me wrong, Andy was a good guy. I loved him, I still love him, and always will. He helped me with a lot of things in life. But this car proved to me that his needs were above my own. He knew what he wanted out of life, and I didn't. So I ended up going along with his plans for life. I thought he was smarter than me and knew more about life than I did. The car was just one example of how I forgot about my needs and wants and instead follow whatever he wanted. I understand that relationships can be like that in some things, but it almost seemed like every detail of our relationship was like that. We grew apart because I didn't know who I was without him, and I needed to find out.

All of this is what my car (Berger) represented to me. This is why I had to get rid of it. And now, on to new things... my NEW CAR! :)

Let me introduce to you.... SCHERBATSKY.

Pontiac G6. I am really excited about this car, it is so awesome! (My parents have the same car. But mine will definitely be Angie-fied soon. :)) And yes, I have named by car Scherbatsky after one Robin Scherbatsky from How I Met Your Mother. I feel her and I are so similar so this is the perfect name for my car.

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